My Angel

Is this an angel entering my life,
A gift from the heavens to save me from my life,
Can she quell my demons,
Set me on the mysterious path to happiness,
What have I done to be so lucky,
Is it fate,
Or just my time,
Spending hours talking,
Voices floating to the heavens and back,
What wondrous things will happen from here,
But lets not fast forward life,
Just enjoy each magical second of discovery,
Each hour of intimacy,
To kiss her warm skin, to feel her warm breath on mine, To watch her sleep,
To touch her hair,
Am I to be so lucky,
Such ecstasy I am filled with when she is near, Every fibre of my body humming with electricity, Butterflies inside fluttering once more,
Feeling eighteen again,
Excitement buzzes through me just to feel like this, First time once in a life time,
every time she looks my way,
Numbing my eternal pain,
Giving myself up to her completely,
The way she walks,
Her eyes sparkle like stars when she smiles,
A love so strong my heart cannot bear,
To be away from her is pain in its most intense,
I can not breath,
Gasping for air like a fish floundering on damp sand, She comes to my rescue returning me to the sea of hers, Warm and comforting,
Passionate in full intensity,
Finding me bearing my soul to her completely,
What happened to my shield protecting my fragile heart, Never to be breached till now,
One night together was all it took, For her magic to melt away my resistance, One night etched on my soul it will forever remain, Tattooed on my heart showing me love exists, My angel my love my life my reason my baby, What has become of me,
As long as she is here with me who cares,
Let our lives unfold together,
I’m here for her and she for me,
She is the one,
She is my angel.

I had met someone at the tail end of 2004, in that some how magical space between the 14th of October and my birthday on the 29th October. She was an assistant manager at the hotel I worked in, I think she started either the end of August or early September. We had a weddding on the lawn for a couple of hundred guests, and as usual the task was all hands on. All the managers, waiters, function organisers and anyone else they could rope in. As this particular assistant manager past me to take the food that was ready to go to guests, i noticed she seemed to best over a little further as to give me a good view of her wares, so to speak. We flirted during the preceding few weeks off the 28th of October, we had a staff blow out in town and I had my drinking buddy’s up from Northamptonshire. It was a hell of a night out, one whose effects would last until the end of November, kidneys were red hot and screaming for mercy. We got together that night, I felt she was different, she even told me she was falling for me by mid November, and subsequently dumped me on Christmas Day. It shook me, I even carefully hand wrote this poem on a piece of yellow quality art paper and framed it, for? You guessed it, a Christmas present! I felt a bit of a twat, proclaiming my undying love in print, to the woman who has just dumped me.

I dont lay the blame at her door, I was an alcoholic trying desperately to paint on the face of normality, my second wife is the only woman I have ever loved enough to give up booze for, and if she was ever to leave me, I would be pissed within the hour, for without her in my life, it is not worth staying sober for.

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